At the core of each of us lies a universal desire: to feel seen, heard, and understood.
During our time as classroom teachers, we prioritized truly understanding each student. We wanted to know what they loved, what frustrated them, their interests, abilities, family life, and more.
By learning about our students, we could design lessons that were not only more engaging but also more meaningful. This deeper understanding allowed us to connect with them in genuinely profound ways.
When we transitioned to the role of principal, we both were very determined to continue this practice. While we weren’t perfect, we were committed to growing in this area because we believed in its importance.
One initiative I (Todd) implemented was a beginning-of-the-year survey for my staff, similar to what I had done with my students. This survey included typical questions like t-shirt sizes and allergies but also some fun and personal ones:
- What’s your favorite sweet snack?
- What’s your favorite salty snack?
- What’s your favorite Sonic drink? (We had one nearby and everyone loved it.)
- How do you like your coffee?
- If you were to grab a quick snack or drink from a gas station or Dollar General, what would you choose?
- Who is your favorite singer/band/musician?
- Who is someone in your life who matters to you a lot? What is their phone number and mailing address?
These responses were invaluable throughout the year. When someone was having a tough day or week, I could bring them their favorite Sonic drink or snack. It wasn’t just about the snack or drink—it was about showing them I saw and appreciated them enough to bring their favorite.
The final question was my favorite. Throughout the year, I could call or write a letter to that “person who matters to you” and celebrate my staff member with them. This was a powerful way to recognize someone on a personal level.
In my current role at TEPSA, I get to work with leaders from around the state of Texas. Every year in June, we bring all the Region Leaders together for an event called Leadership U, which trains them on their new volunteer roles. This year, I sent out a survey similar to the one I had used with my staff. Before Leadership U started, I personally wrote each of them a postcard, thanking them for choosing to serve in this role this year. I used the survey they filled out and added a special quote from their favorite musician. This way, they knew I was truly writing that note specifically for them.
It was so powerful to see how many lit up when reading the note, thinking, “How did he know I loved Bruce Springsteen?” They had forgotten they filled out the form weeks before!
Though I had a blister on my hand from writing over 150 notecards, it was totally worth it! Haha!
The beauty of this survey idea is you don’t have to wait for an administrator to implement it. You can take a moment to get to know a few people around you, whether they’re colleagues or students. It’s a simple yet effective way to acknowledge someone in a specific and meaningful manner.
Give it a try and let us know how it goes!
Todd Nesloney is TEPSA’s Director of Culture and Strategic Leadership. He is an award-winning educator, author and international speaker.
Ross Braun is a former elementary principal who is passionate about supporting schools and leaders to ensure every child has a safe, loving, and engaging learning environment. Ross is now the VP of Positive Education at Spring, Texas-based, School Life.
