By Daniel Patterson
Grief. It’s a polarizing word. Grief is messy. It’s uncomfortable. It’s unpredictable. And it beckons conflict and chaos when not adequately acknowledged and proactively addressed. Grief in its most familiar context is deep sorrow, especially caused by someone’s death. But grief sneaks into the corners of everyday life disguised as sorrow, anguish, sadness, misery, pain, agony and distress. If we were playing emotional bingo, it’s safe to say everyone would be a winner.
Our education system is in a grief cycle, but most aren’t calling it by its name. Instead, many prefer to throw around terms like “new normal” to express the disconnect between the routine and familiar tenents of education, and the tangled web of uncertainty tossing educators and students around in a sea of variables. “New normal” is not even close to a dignified term for what teachers and students are experiencing: substantial direct and indirect trauma stemming from a pandemic, remote learning, isolation, economic uncertainty, elevated poverty, death of loved ones, a civil rights movement, and political polarization.
Grief, as you might recall, has stages. Denial. Anger. Bargaining. Depression. And, acceptance. These stages, of course, are not concrete. They ebb and flow. As we head into the new school year, it’s critical to acknowledge that your entire school ecosystem is in some stage of grief. So, what can school leaders do to best serve their staff, so that the staff can best serve their students?
Embed mechanisms for staff members to process trauma. A several-day staff intensive, supported by quarterly staff check-ins is recommended for substantive support to exist. Effective training will be professionally led by outside experts specializing in trauma, chronic stress, grief, and mental strength. Many adults have a hard time identifying their feelings and properly processing their lived experiences. If left unattended, emotions will morph into increased sick days, poor student relationships, tainted colleague relationships, and attrition. What’s more, when the staff is professionally trained, they inherently become more adept to properly recognize and act on the parallel emotional roadblocks plaguing students.
Understand that curricular goals are now secondary to emotional goals. Of course, your socially distanced, hybrid, or remote learning systems are integral to student success, but the primary driver in student success is staff wellness. Scan social media for about 10 minutes and you will discover the avalanche of teacher anxiety as it relates to adequately managing their own uncertainties, let alone those of their students. In selecting staff development, rely on the mantra “you can’t pour from an empty cup” when deciding how to allocate your time and resources.
Bring the formally footnoted “employee assistance programs” to life. Sure, your staff has access to mental health services, but these services typically remain buried within a new hire’s handbook or a teacher organization’s website. By implementing the aforementioned staff intensives, the services are humanized, the topics become more approachable, and the conversion rate for staff utilization of private services increases tenfold. Literacy is critical, but so is social-emotional awareness, and zeroing in on precisely how your student population will be supported from the inside out.
Don’t forget about you, too. As a school administrator, I consistently put my own mental health on the backburner. I was chronically fatigued both physically and emotionally, and it led to a dark place. Don’t repeat my mistakes. I implore you to be a lead-griever. Grieve openly. Grieve bravely. Grieve with professional supports in place. And convert your leadership into meaningful change, not just for your staff and students, but for your own wellbeing.
Daniel Patterson is an administrator, advocate, author and speaker. Daniel currently serves as the director of education for a therapeutic high school in Los Angeles, California. Previously, the author of RECOVER[edu] (2020) and The Assertive Parent (2018) worked as an assistant principal and English teacher for 14 years. Daniel is dedicated to bringing awareness and transformational programming to mental health, substance use, and authenticity within education.
TEPSA News, August 2020, Vol 77, No 4
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